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The Torah is Torat Chaim – literally, the instructions for living. "A man should therefore leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis ). Marriage is not two people coming together to form a partnership, nor an agreement to be roommates permanently.How do you think the Torah describes the state of being married? It’s not a method to get a tax break, or a way to share household chores.We will never hear a eulogy of how he “was a very classy dresser, he always drove this year's model, and his house was enormous." Besides this, success and career as life goals are not necessarily conducive to a good marriage. Couples may argue over a stray toothpaste cap or whose turn it is to get up with the baby, but no matter how heated these run-ins become, they should never destroy a marriage. Then you can talk about whether or not the person you’re dating is moving in the same direction.Success requires a lot of time and energy, and that often comes at the expense of one’s spouse and family. Here are two exercises that might help clarify things: a) Life goals are those things you’d regret not having done if you died tomorrow. And then: If you're ready to die for it, live for it. b) List three people you respect most in the world. Commitment When it comes to the topic of marriage, many people wonder: Why bother?These are lovely sentiments, but in the words of Gloria Steinem, "We best know our values when we look at our check stubs." Our true values are most revealed – not by what we say, but by the way we spend our time and money.If we aren't clearly defining our life goals, then they are being defined for us.

Articulate the essential things that make life constantly purposeful. We learn from here that originally Man was created as male and female in one complete entity. My commitment to my hand is one I'd reconsider if it became gangrenous, and I was left with no choice but amputation.Imagine marriage as a journey down the path of life. What is necessary for the two travelers in this car to “unite” for this trip?Life Goals The essence of marriage is the commitment to pursue life goals together.Life goals are the things in life that mean everything to you, the values that you stand for, that you're willing to sacrifice for. If she’s not nice to her own family, there’s a good chance she’s not going to be nice to yours, either.If they're so easy to change, then chances are they're not so important to you. This person is going to be the parent of your children. You can't delay discussing life goals, hoping you'll come to an agreement once you're married, expecting the other person to change. For many people, the problem is the lack of clear life goals.

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